Luminous Beings We Are

My daughter, Ava, came into this world remembering. I hope she never forgets. Between the ages of 1 and 2 she fell in love with birds, remembering her wings. It was a game we played, especially her “Gampy.” Two souls on very different levels, teaching each other. She would sit on his lap in front of his computer screen, while he pulled up the songs of the birds she was learning. “What’s this one,” he would ask, and she’d identify the voice. For her second birthday I gave her a “Bird Party,” and she dazzled the guests with her ability to identify and name.  It seemed fated that my husband and I had chosen the name “Ava” for our daughter.  A being of the earth, but not bound to it.

When she was two, Ava traded in her passion for birds for a new love. Yoda. My husband had begun showing her nonviolent scenes from “Star Wars,” and Ava developed a crush on the adorably ugly green being. Again, we all jumped on board. I found her a Yoda costume for Halloween, my parents a back-pack for her birthday. When she turned 3 we urged the party-goers to hit the dark side of the pinata, which bore the taped figure of Darth Vader, to release the prizes held within.

As with the birds, I found my young daughter’s natural attraction to the essence of her existence fascinating and beautiful. Today, my wish is that each of you be reminded of what “Luminous beings we are.” – Yoda

Mother Nature’s GMO

This morning in my email mailbox I had a newsletter from Kaitlyn Keyt, who communicates with nature spirits to create high vibrational products. Her website is: http://vibesup.com/

In today’s newsletter she wrote about programming plant seeds with your saliva to grow  produce designed for your best health. Quite a wild concept, isn’t it? I bet you want to try it? I do.

Naturally, I felt the urge to write a little poem:

Mother Nature’s GMO

she said spit on seeds
I thought of almonds
coated with candy

lay them on earth, catch
sun rays, burn your code
back into the womb

“Let the day find you.” – Mary A. Hall, channeling the Divine

The Wisdom of Trees: A Guided Meditation

This meditation came to me in 2012, but I am updating it and expanding upon it, as it lacked fluidity and needed some expansion.

Find a comfortable place to sit with your bare feet touching the ground (or floor). Point your toes slightly inward so that the key energy points in your feet are connecting to the Earth. If it is more comfortable for you to lie down, that is also fine. It is your intentional connection to the Earth energy that matters most.

Play soft music if you wish and light a candle on a safe surface in front of you, encircling it with symbols that have a meaningful connection to Earth for you, such as animal totem figurines, crystals, stones, leaves, flowers or feathers.

If you choose to, place meditation crystals or stones you feel a connection to at this moment, in your palms. While you meditate you may feel like bringing these crystals together along with your palms, so that one hand loosely cups the top of your other hand, completing a circle of energy.

Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths, pulling the red energy of the Earth up through your body, through the soles of your feet, up through the base of our spine and into all the cells of your body, grounding and connecting you with the sacred energy of Earth. While you are taking these grounding breaths, call in your spirit guides, animal guides, guardian angels, the fairies and other energies of light. Ask them to work with you in your highest good to heal a place of dis-ease in your body, or an emotion you are struggling to release. Or, simply ask for general guidance and healing, and for these sacred energies to help guide you along your life’s path.

Imagine a golden or white translucent cloak of energy surrounding you in protection, knowing that your body is safe while your spirit takes this journey.

You now find yourself in a forest glen surrounded by a small circle of trees. Fairies dance among the delicate star-like flowers at your feet and fly through the green leaves of the trees surrounding you. Your animal and spirit guides have entered the glen with you, along with the angels and beings of light you have called in. You are surrounded and supported by their love. You are completely safe.

As you continue to breathe deeply and evenly, you find your feet becoming like the roots of trees, and you send these roots deep into the Earth, until you reach the crystalline center. You are now powerfully grounded into the Earth, strong and stable. Nothing can topple you. Gaia, the great Earth Mother, is sharing her energy with you, and your hearts beat as one. Allow your body and soul to welcome her healing love, knowing that the energy you share with her is also shared with all living beings on the planet.  Take a moment to offer your love and gratitude to Gaia and all life on this beautiful planet you call home.

Begin now to send this wonderful life force energy up through your body, knowing that as you do, it is filled with the red and green energies of the Earth, which stabilize and heal. Send this energy to all cells within your body, allowing them to fill with vitality and health.

The trunk of your body, your torso, is like the trunk of a tree, stable and strong. Feel the strength of your spinal column aligned in perfect health. Breathe in this knowing.

Now feel the energy expand through your upper torso and into your head. Your arms have become like the branches of a tree, and you may wish to raise them to the sky, or simply imagine that they are connecting you with the Divine life force energy of the Universe. Allow the green leaves of new life to unfurl from your palms, and into all cells of your body, knowing that you are not only healing your physical and emotional body, but actively creating new life, replacing the old, worn patterns, with the light energy of Love that is sent from the Divine Source in the Universe.  Now you are joined with the energy of the Earth and the energy of Source.

Butterflies and birds begin to appear, attracted to the strength and bounty of your energy, which is like the tree. These wonderful beings of Earth and Sky know that you offer your light to share, and they, in exchange, can teach you. These wonderful beings know the secrets of living in joy and harmony, and the butterfly, in particular, understands the power of transformation. Take a moment to watch and listen.

As you unfurl leaves into a canopy, you are experiencing the energy of transformation. Allow this energy to enter your physical body and be absorbed. You may have an emotional release in the form of tears. Do not fight the release, knowing that tears are the body’s way of cleansing trapped emotions.  Follow the healing, transformative energy into the pockets of pain inside your body. Imagine each pocket holds a seed and allow the seed to germinate and blossom as the denser energy is transformed to light.

As you experience the sensation of this energy healing, Eagle appears showing you that once you are grounded and whole, you can also experience the sensation of flight. Allow your spirit to soar with the powerful energy of Eagle in effortless freedom. This is the power of your own light body that you are experiencing, a part of you that is always in existence, connecting you to the Source energy of the Universe.

Spend some time playing and flying with Eagle and other winged beings who are here with you. Then, when you are ready, enter your body and feel the solid connection you have with Earth. Take 3 deep grounding breaths and feel your roots connected firmly to Earth. Slowly move your body, and before you go on with your day thank your animal guides, spirit guides, angels, fairies, Gaia and the Divine for being with you. Ask that their healing energy and love stay with you as you go about your day, gently guiding you along your true path of love and light.

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Updated on August 24, 2015

Butterfly

If I could I would paint you a picture, but I’ll have to settle for words. Right now, as I write, I also watch two robins work to build a nest out of my lilac bush.  I am reminded again of black and orange.

Yesterday morning my body needed to rest, so I placed my cloudy head against the pillow of my couch. Right side facing down. The side that ached. But, in truth it seemed my entire body was out of balance. I thought I might throw-up. I thought I might faint. I thought I might have a migraine. I had just read my mother’s email, which said nothing upsetting. Still, my body reacts to her energy. Long before she sends her words I know when she is thinking about me. Recall “Weight of Water”.

As I rested, drifting in that space between waking and dream, a picture flashed inside my brain. From a branch filled with deep pink blossoms, a butterfly emerged with orange wings veined in black.

I’ve been thinking a lot about butterflies since I began to see them appearing in the forest two months ago. The first butterfly I saw was brown with ivory tipped wings. It was so early, only the 20th of March.  I thought for sure it was a fairy, only realizing later that it didn’t matter. Weeks turned into months, as I watched more butterflies appear and follow me along my walks, heedless of the dogs, even Rosy who joyously tried to chase them into the shadows.

Butterfly is perhaps the most overt symbol of transformation. An earthbound caterpillar slowly eats its way through vegetation, growing until its body is ready for change. Inside the womb of a chrysalis the caterpillar’s body dissolves into a sea of cells that reorganize to form a new being. Colors dissolve and new colors emerge. Wings form. The creature that emerges, although of the Earth, is no longer bound to it. When it desires to, it can take flight and experience the unencumbered element of air.

What though, of the vision sent to me as I rested my unbalanced body?  The pink blossoms I see as the chrysalis of the heart. From the pink womb of the heart our true selves are born, and when we allow them, they emerge. My butterfly was orange. The color of the 2nd, sacral chakra, the seat of our basic emotions and our creativity. When it is imbalanced our bodies react. Our minds cloud over. When it is humming with health, it allows us to create from our truths.

The butterfly was veined in black, symbolic of the source of all creation. When I asked my guides what they wanted me to learn from this vision, they told me it was time for me to “Wake up that which was latent.”

The Weight of Water

The weight of my mother rests inside my chest. Last night, in dream, I saw her face as it once was, young and full of beauty. Inside her blue eyes there was the light of hope and understanding. My urgent words had started breaking down a barrier and through its thinned walls I could see the beauty of her soul. I wonder does she know that we all hold pain within our bodies, but each of us has the will to set it free?

Later, I walked through a land covered in blue-gray. A still water rose with my steps, covering the earth. Together, the water and I reached a transformer station, where electrical energy is caged behind wires before it is sent to our homes. I wondered what would happen when we all met: water, electricity and me. What would my body do with the surge of power?

Signs

When I was in college at Bowdoin I took an anthropology class taught by a very bright and energetic professor. One day the professor told us a story about the artifacts that she had collected and displayed on a shelf in her house. They were from all over the world. Many were old, carrying the energies of countless hands. One day, as she stood in her room with them, all of the stone figures fell towards her, landing in a circle around her.

I was very much a skeptic in college, having yet to open myself up to awareness. Still, I secretly believed my professor. She was down-to-earth and incredibly bright. There was no indication that she was trying to pull the wool over our eyes, but rather take it off. If I had been taking the class now, I wouldn’t have batted an eye.

I spent this afternoon pondering the fairy figurine (see photo below) that is perched on a shelf beside the window I face when I type on my computer. I always face the figurine to the right, towards my etched glass of two dancing fairies. When I looked up from typing my emails earlier today it was facing left, 180 degrees, its outstretched arm beckoning towards an orchid. I was the only one home today (but just to double-check I asked my family later if they had moved it. No). I dusted the shelf yesterday, and as I always do, faced the fairy to the right. I knew someone was trying to tell me something.

Maybe I was supposed to water the plants and give them some fertilizer. So I put a few drops in the can and gave the houseplants, including the orchid, a drink.  I was just covering bases though, clearly the fairies were trying to communicate with me. Heck, even my dog knows they’ve been trying to get my attention for months.

I just had to figure out what it was. I started by asking Doreen Virtue’s deck of Healing with the Fairies cards and drew “Environmental Awareness.” Anyone who knows me would not be surprised. I guess it’s time to buckle up, listen and pay attention, which is what I did for the rest of the afternoon. Here’s to another leg of my journey! Stay tuned…

After Rain

I love the green of spring, especially after rain. Yesterday, to escape the density of energy trapped inside walls, I went outside between rain showers and walked in the woods (see also yesterday’s photos). There is nothing quite like the energy of the forest, especially in spring when everything is waking up. I took my camera along and tried to capture the energy in green. I went to bed last night thinking about kitchens back-splashed in ferns.

Lightning

I was surprised by the lightning, even though I had welcomed the steady rain that promises to fill the day with the possibility of quiet reflection, meditation and writing. I began by spreading the oracle cards from Steve Farmer’s deck Earth Magic, in a circle upon my coffee table. Twice I let my hand gravitate to the cards at the top of the circle before I pulled out Lightning/Power, and looked at the orange fire spread in a vein of electricity  touching the turquoise crest of waves. There are rocks along the shore, the trees lean against the pull of the wind. The sky is indigo. Least I doubt my choice of cards,  Farmer’s guidebook folded open to its page.

I spread tiger-eye, lapis lazuli, malachite, turquoise and carnelian agate around my pillar of unpolished rose quartz, guarded it with my white angel and lit the pink candle on the table. I was ready to welcome power in whatever form it wanted to speak to me, but first I placed amethyst in my left palm and angelite in my right. Closing gently my fists, I felt the pulses of crystal energy.

I spent about an hour in meditation, letting my thoughts come and go, feeling the hiccup of my breath against my heartbeat. I cannot tell you everything I saw or felt, because some things are stored only for our experience and not for memory. I can tell you that Angelite brought three animal totems to me. First came Seal, a new visitor, wearing the gray silk of creative waters. Then Bat appeared, another surprise, upside down like the Hanged Man card in tarot. (Yesterday I found myself thinking about this card and how it relates to rainbows. That red energy turned towards the sky.) Bat evokes nighttime, like the Power/Lightning card I drew. It foreshadows a time of transition and initiation. I heard the rustle of the crystals still left in their bags beside me. Bat reminds us that there is rebirth out of darkness if we are willing to let the old die to make way for new life. Through facing our fears we can become empowered. The last two nights I shifted through the clutter of old fears still nesting inside of me. I entered dreams within dreams, analyzing the residue of bathrooms, wiping feces from white walls. I tried to resist, but could not, the scattering of superficial beauty tangled into necklaces in boxes and scattered like dust under beds…

After I watched Seal and Bat appear, my old friend, Snake stopped by, twisting its body into dance, its head lifted with two wide eyes daring mine to close. I must tell you that before, during and after these three animals appeared to me, my body was experiencing pockets of pain.  I watched yellow/white energy transfer to my more closed-off right side of my body in gentle waves. This was easy compared to the dis-ease stored in my belly, that center of  power. Nausea came and the impulse to pull out of my meditation. From outside my body I felt my breath deepen as it traveled to the source of the pain, urging release of the old, stored energy to make way for new. This, was not easy.   Hovering at the base of my spine was a spinning vortex, its hum lifting, energizing. The kundalini of Snake. And then there was that dark pit, deep inside my lower right abdomen. I felt and heard my breath deepen its pull as it worked to release an energy accumulation beyond this life. I put my feet on the floor, welcoming the red energy of Earth to aid my breath, feeling the easy hum inside my left foot, but not my right.

This morning I took my first dose of my decreased thyroid medication. 88. A double-dose of infinity. It’s just the beginning.

Finding Your Sacred Garden Meditation

Do you know what your sacred garden looks like? If not, close your eyes and let it appear. Your palette is the universe, so paint the picture in your heart.

The first time I visited my sacred garden I was meditating in a dream workshop. Here is what it looks like in  the canvass of my mind:

It’s twilight. Imagine, if you will, an old English garden. In its center is a well. Beside the well stands a white horse and a large green frog sits near its stone edge. Beyond the grass, surrounding the well, is a hedge of mazes wrapping around flowers in a matrix of mystery. Here is where magic hides in the form of fairies, unicorns and other “mythical” creatures.

My sacred garden is a place where I can meet and mingle with my spirit and animal guides. Each animal and guide has a lesson to teach. Sometimes horse appears, reminding me of my strength and courage. Rabbit shows me the fears that I am ready to leave behind, and Snake, the aspects of self that are ready to be shed. Eagle, a constant companion, reminds me of the power of voice and to follow my life’s purpose.

To find your own sacred garden, find a quiet space in nature, or inside a dwelling, and relax into a meditative state. Ground yourself to the Earth energy by imagining that you are like a tree, sending your roots deep into the Earth. Close your eyes and take 3 deep belly breaths.

Call in your spirit guides and angels, and ask that you be surrounded by a protective white or golden light. Ask for those on your spirit team who wish to send you messages appear, including your animal guides, fairy beings and unicorns. Clear your mind of thoughts, or, if they appear, let them gently pass through your mind like leaves floating along a river. Now it’s time to play.

Your mind is your canvass, paint it as you wish. Allow your sacred garden to appear to you without effort. Have fun. You may find that your garden is a surprise, unexpected. Perhaps it is a desert landscape, filled with red rocks and cliffs with few, if any, plants. Perhaps it is a mountain top, or a forest. Whatever appears to you, and feels right, use it. Build upon it. Add whatever adornments you desire, such as a dwelling, a pond, a wishing well, or a stone wall. Welcome in Nature’s children, and observe what animals and other beings appear to you.

When your garden feels complete, reside within your sacred place, knowing it is your own to take refuge in. Here you may find peace and healing. Listen and observe. Are there symbols for you to translate? Messages from your spirit or animal guides? Do you feel moved to walk around, to swim in water, or to ride upon an animal? What do you feel? Are you here to release a fear, or perhaps just to seek peace and balance? Allow whatever you feel called to experience to occur in the safe space of your garden, surrounded as you are with the healing energy of Mother Earth and the Divine beings that have gathered with you. Then, when you feel ready to leave, thank the Earth Mother and your guides and slowly return to the room or space you are sitting in. Gently move your arms and legs and take 3 deep grounding breaths. Give gratitude to all who have gathered with you and shared their healing and light, including yourself for creating this sacred space.

The Art of Allowing

This morning, after a night dreaming about wearing yellow and talking to a lollipop; after a weekend trying to neutralize my daughter’s emotions while we were at a hotel for a conference of my husband’s, I finished the manuscript for my memoir. At least, that is,  to the point where I am ready to start sending it out to agents/publishers. I had finished my last round of revisions last week, but had one more poem to write. This morning I allowed it to appear. I called it “Truth” and felt satisfied with the simplicity of the lyrics that took form on the page.

Now, as I sit here, there is the part of me pulling for action. That restless ego that doesn’t like to sit still and let the universe string together the pattern that will shape the outcome I want to manifest. But, I have learned, and am still learning, that in the quiet space of allowing we are given the gifts we desire. That everything we need comes to us when we release the pull.

Yesterday, I came home exhausted and irritable, and found a package waiting for me from a dear friend. I put the house in order enough for the anxieties inside of me to settle down, and then opened. For the second time this year, a friend had given me exactly what I needed, at the perfect moment. This friend (a different one than the other instance), had sent to me her medicine cards not knowing how perfect her timing was. I didn’t tell her that today I would be working with animal totems in class, but her heart knew that I would use this gift. She didn’t know that I had been wanting my own set, only that I was learning the language of animal messengers.

And, of course, her gift, which came at just the right time, saved me just that. Time. I had no idea what “animal” I was going to bring to class before the gift arrived. Yet, something inside of me knew to wait. So now, I feel the struggle to let go of the rope, to trust that those spiders in the last post will burst out of their orbs and spin their webs. It’s not that I don’t want to work at getting my manuscript published, but there is the understanding that often when we try too hard at something we fail, or at least do not achieve what we could. The idea of “paddling upstream,” as Ester Hicks would say, when we can just let go the oars and allow the current to carry us where it will. I am not sure yet how this will happen in what is normally perceived to be such a cut-throat, competitive industry, but I am willing to trust that the act of letting go of the “struggle,” even just a little bit, will make the journey easier. Will make the destination more fulfilling. It has, after all, happened this way for others.

So, here’s to allowing with the intention that my words will soon heal so many more souls than just my own.