My grandmother is 94.5 yrs olds. It’s one of the few, consistent facts she remembers. It’s become quite clear as of late that she has turned a corner in her life’s journey. When I call her, I’m never quite sure what type of response I will get, if any.
A couple of weeks ago, I called to receive her announcement, “I dumped all my medications.”
I hesitated a moment before I asked, “You did? How are you feeling?”
“I feel great,” she declared as she went on to tell me how all her previous discomforts had now vanished.
Later, after we hung up there were a flurry of calls and messages that she didn’t know about to confirm facts and safety. As far as I know, though, Gram is still off her meds but is being closely monitored and cared for in the facility where she lives. My grandmother, you see, has wanted to die since my grandfather passed away two decades ago.
But she has lingered here in this life and often she wonders why. Nearly every time I call her, she brings up her daughter, my mother.
“Did you hear your mother called me and she’s coming to visit me?”
This announcement followed the heals of the one about her medications. It took me a little longer to react, and now no one I have spoken with is sure if it is true. More than a week has now passed and as far as I know my mother hasn’t left the state where she and I both reside to travel 3,000 miles across the country to say goodbye to her mother before she passes.
My feelings are mixed, but what matters is how my grandmother feels. She’s waited 30 yrs, as she tells me know each time I call, for this moment, and it is enough in her mind that a long awaited connection of peace was been made. I don’t care if that call was real. I care that it has brought my grandmother the peace she has been waiting for.
Stories of the elderly or terminally ill lingering longer than expected in life are not uncommon. And, quite often it is because of a desire to mend relationships or to say goodbye to those that one holds dear. I am so glad my grandmother got the call she has been waiting three decades for. A call where her beloved daughter told her she wants to let go of their wounded history. Whether it was real or not doesn’t really matter because it has brought my grandmother the joy and peace she has been waiting for.
Last night, my grandmother brought me the gift of joy. And, after a very challenging year, it was just what I needed. Joy, in the dream, arrived in the form of a magical room I didn’t know existed in my “house.” When I crossed the threshold of the door, my body lost the pull of gravity and flew, guided by the unseen presence of my grandmother. Each stop in the room, yielded a gift of love and symbol of joy for the four members of my family.
Whether my grandmother’s spirit actually visited me in my dreams, doesn’t really matter. It is not uncommon though, to hear of such occurrences when souls are preparing to transition. Because I have had more than a couple “spectral” visitations that have been aptly timed, unexpected, and with synchronistic messages for loved ones, I’d like to believe this one was real. Real enough, at the very least, to bring the gift of joy. And, for that I am grateful.
Thank you for sharing about your grandmother, Alethea. It seems like she is ready to meet her maker and she is in peace. Her visit to you in “spirit”surely brought you joy and peace also. Is she on the west coast?
LikeLiked by 1 person
It was a lovely gift indeed. Yes, she lives in Portland at an assisted living facility.
LikeLike
My daughter’s family is in Portland. We were going to visit them this weekend but we cancelled the trip, rescheduled for next month. Which facility in Portland?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I recall that about your daughter’s family being in Portland. I’m sorry your latest visit had to be rescheduled. My grandmother is in Prestige Assisted Living.
LikeLike
I just looked it up. It’s 7 miles from where my daughter is.
My mother in law is in an assisted living facility. When we visited her, she didn’t want to talk too much and wanted to keep it short. We only stayed with her less than 15 minutes.
I curious pop in and visit your grandmother for a few minutes if she is open to it but probably wait until I’m going for sure, and not to give her too far in advance notice. She may get anxious about that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is very sweet of you. I am not sure what their visitation status is right now. It seems to change constantly. She told me they have been in lock-down for 2 months, but that may or may not be true. I think my uncle is allowed to visit her in a designated place.
LikeLike
We met with my husband’s mom at the lounge wearing masks. It was for family members only. It’s good that you’re uncle visited her.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That may be where they have visitors at her facility as well. I think he goes on a regular basis to check-in and bring her anything she needs.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad she has someone visiting her regularly! My husband has four siblings live close to his mom and they take turns to visit her. She is very lucky.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is wonderful you husband’s family is so dedicated and close.
LikeLiked by 1 person
His mother has many shortcomings, even before she has dementia. His family is dedicated. I don’t see that often when I look around.
LikeLiked by 1 person
At such an advanced age, I do hope your dear grandmother mentally heals whatever is wrong between her and your mother if possible and dies in peace. Hugs xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Joy, as do I. It seems that she has achieved a great deal of peace simply through that phone call, whether it happened or not…❤️
LikeLike
I “could”…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad your grandmother has found some peace and you had a joyful visit in your dream. As you mentioned, the facts matter less than how you both feel. May she pass in peace. 🙏
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Brad. 💙
LikeLiked by 1 person
There were many years when I endeavored to be logical because it felt safe. When my mother started getting more confused in the years leading up to her death, I mistakenly tried to get her to see reality. My Aunt Ruth died last year at the age of 95. She helped me learn to go with the flow when talking with her on the phone – it was much like what you describe with your grandmother. Your beautiful message about what matters most helps move me along in my journey from what is logical to what is magical. Now, I much prefer magical. Thank you for your wisdom, Alethea.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, JoAnna. It’s not always easy talking with her. Sometimes she can be unkind and I need to remind myself she is working going through her journey as best she can. ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤ Wishing you peace.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
It sounds like you have both found your peace and acceptance of what is to come…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think so. I hope so ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Alethea, there is so much love here. The call, real or imagined, brought loving energy filled with joy to you in a dream. Loving energy never dies. Thank you for sharing. Much love to you all. ❤ xXx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Jane ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a beautiful story as I especially cherish those regarding family. I’m so happy to have come across your page, I love the title as well as the concept. Thanks for sharing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much. I’m so glad you enjoyed the piece. And, thank you for visiting my blog. Happy Valentine’s Day ❤️
LikeLike
Same to you dear & I’m happy to support. Looking forward to reading more of your posts.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And I, yours. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person