It was some time ago, but not so long that my body does not remember the feel of being woken in the dead of night to the tug of a hand that had no form.

I didn’t go there for the ghosts. In fact, I didn’t know about the residence specters until after I arrived on campus for my week’s stay. I’ll take a single room, I decided when the dormitory form came out. It’s worth the extra cost. It was a decision I would soon come to regret.

But I was an adult. A mom of two young kids in her mid thirties looking forward to some time alone amidst a community of fellow writers. I was looking forward to sleeping in my own space, undisturbed.

The first night was not so bad. The dorm was a bit rundown, with no extra frills. Still, it was better than my undergraduate residence. I had space to myself, even though I was sharing a bathroom with strangers. And I had a view with a dormered window overlooking fields once owned by rural Vermont farmers.

“At least you’re not in the faculty dorm, that one’s the worst.”

But I was told that later, after the events that occurred on the third night of my stay.

It had begun like the first two, but by then I had made friends with some of my fellow dorm mates. I was feeling more at home and relaxed. In fact, I was feeling rather elated with my decision to steal away from home for two weeks a year to study the craft of writing in a tiny town in the middle of New England. It was a dream coming true. A dream I had held inside of me since I was five years old.

So there I was on my third night of residency, ready for a good sleep in preparation for a full day immersed in this passion. I brushed my teeth and washed my face in the shared bathroom, then made my way down the hall to my room. The air around me felt a bit unsettled as I changed into my pajamas, and I found myself checking the corners like I did as a child before I turned out the lights.

Never mind, I told myself as I tugged the covers around my head (another habit carried over from childhood), you’re just not used to this space yet.

It took some time, but eventually I succumbed to sleep. A sleep deep enough to take me into the wee hours of the morning. Those hours where it was darkest before the dawn of light crested the hills beyond my window. Dark enough so that I could not see anything at all, if my eyes had been open.

But I was not so deep inside of sleep that I could not be woken. And wake I did, never to sleep again for the rest of the night, for at the back of my head I suddenly felt a violent tug.

My heart raced my eyes open to an inky blackness.

I could see nothing, but I could feel a presence. The presence of an unseen energy that had just pulled my hair.

I rubbed the back of my head, still scanning the room.

Alright, I told myself. Maybe it was just a dream. But how could a dream leave a physical mark?

I had no doubt my hair had been pulled.

I tried to will my eyes closed as I wrapped my head, once again, in blankets. Seconds passed into minutes before I realized there was no way my mind was going to allow a return to sleep. I stuck one brave arm out of the covers and turned on the light.

The next morning, after I showered and dressed, I went downstairs to meet up with my friends Stacey and Elisabeth so that we could walk to breakfast together. Elisabeth was still getting ready in her room, so Stacey and I began chatting in the hallway. Nearby, one of the housekeeping staff was fixing a broken light.

“How’d you sleep?” Stacey asked. “I’m sorry Elisabeth is taking so long,” she added. “It takes her awhile to get her affairs in order.”

“No worries,” I replied, then paused. “But something weird happened last night.”

“What, what was weird?” Elisabeth asked, appearing beside us with her backpack slung over her shoulder. She looked eager. Rather, I thought, like a child about to receive an ice cream cone.

I glanced around. The maintenance man was still tinkering with the ceiling light, but no one else was nearby.

“Well,” I paused again, “I barely slept.” I gulped some air and looked into Elisabeth’s eyes. “I could have sworn someone pulled my hair. I mean, I really felt it. It woke me up.”

Elisabeth didn’t blink, but the corners of her flickered. Stacey began to fidget, glancing from me, to Elisabeth, and back to me, as though waiting for someone to reveal the punchline of a joke.

“Oh,” a man’s voice came from behind me, and I turned to see the maintenance worker making his way down the ladder. “That must have been one of the resident ghosts. There’s one that is rather famous for pulling people’s hair.”

“You’re kidding,” Stacey said.

“I’m not,” he replied as he packed up and left. “Enjoy your stay.”

You might imagine any number of scenarios playing out for the rest of our residencies, and let me tell you there were quite a few. Soon enough we formed our own little ghost haunting unit of five women nearing middle age, but still young enough be a bit foolish. We had our share of unexplainable experiences over the course of the next two years during, and they turned out to be some of the best memories of my life. But, I never slept in a single again.

Although I can’t guarantee you’ll never experience your hair being pulled by a ghost in the middle of the night, I have accumulated some tricks and tips for a better night’s sleep over the years. Here are five of my favorites:

• Zip Up Your Energy: This is an EMYoga exercise I often teach that involves placing one hand on top of the other on your lower abdomen and raising them to your lower lip like you are zipping up a zipper. Your hands can be gently pressing into your body as you zip up, or just above your body. When you get to your lower lip, flip your hands palms up and raise them as high as you can reach overhead, then exhale them around and out to the sides and back down to your lower abdomen. Repeat this exercise two more times, breathing in as your “zip up,” and exhaling as your lower your hands back down. This exercise helps to strength and protect your energy field as it “zips up” your central meridian. Give it a try and see how it feels. I find it helps ward off outside energies that may be unwelcome.
• Spoon Your Feet: This is another technique I learned in my EMYoga training, although I have seen it taught in other classes too. All you need is a stainless steel spoon, preferably tablespoon size. Before you go to bed, take the spoon and rub the rounded bottom of it on the soles of your bare feet for about 30 seconds or so. Thoroughly massage the entire bottom of each of your feet in circular motions, or in figure eight patterns. This exercises helps to calm the body and reset its polarity.
• Put Your Legs Up the Wall: This inversion is often used in yoga classes before or during final relaxation. Make sure you don’t have health contraindications before you try it. If you know inversions are safe for you, give it a try before bed. Maybe give yourself two minutes to scoot up to a wall and lean your legs against it (your bottom should be as close to the wall as possible). Try closing your eyes or softening your gaze with your legs raised and rested against the wall. Notice how you feel. This type of inversion is great for calming the nervous system and preparing the body for sleep.
• Alternate Nostril Breathing: This is another yoga technique that works to calm and center the body and mind. It can be done with a hand, or with visualization. I find visualization is nice to use when lying in bed. Otherwise, you might try the hand technique. For visualization, close your eyes, lie on your back and imagine the air coming in through the right nostril, up towards the space between your eyes, then out the left nostril. Imagine air entering your left nostril as your breath in again, going up to the space between your eyes, and then exiting out your right nostril. Inhale right nostril. Exhale left. Inhale left. Exhale right. Repeat the pattern for about two minutes and then allow a return to your regular breathing pattern.
• Take a Bath or Shower Before Bed: I started taking my showers at night during a particularly stressful period in my life, and I found it to be really beneficial in helping me feel more calm and relaxed before going to bed. A nice warm soak with a few drops of lavender oil (or another calming oil) can be especially nice (please make sure you don’t have an allergy if you are trying an oil).

I hope you enjoyed the real-life ghost story and the bedtime tips. I am starting a new Bedtime Yoga series next month via zoom on Monday evenings at 7pm EST. If you are interested in giving it a try, please visit my website for more information.