A friend of mine just wrote a post that moved me into that place of contemplation. In the quiet space of self, she had allowed herself to explore and love who she is in the moment of Now. Perceived flaws broke open beauty as she found the true light within through touch and acceptance. How many of us, I wonder, hold onto a false sense of self? How many of us want to be beautiful in a way that doesn’t truly define us?
I rarely take selfies. I can count the number of times I’ve tried to on one hand. My face, I have always believed, is not loved by the camera. It is small in size, with a set of teeth that I’ve always thought too large and pronounced for the thin lips and narrow frame. When I smile too wide, I see wrinkles. When I don’t, I see a glaring over-bite.
Sometimes, though, in the private reflection of a mirror, I can find beauty and the parts of me I love. The blue, blue eyes that look like a kaleidoscope of truth. The eyebrows I’ve never plucked and the frame of hair that tends toward unruly. There is a wild me that I love, but what about the rest?
How do we find acceptance in those places where beauty hides from us? Can we love the body of self we have chosen for this life, knowing that this is the only perfect vessel for the journey we are on? We must, I believe, to travel light and in the light.
How often have I pushed against my front teeth with my hand out of rote habit, and wondered how my appearance would have changed with braces? How many times have I longed for full lips and lashes? There have been so many parts of me that I have imagined changed, but for what purpose? To me loved more? By me? By others?
So, today I took the phone resting beside me, and took a look at this self that I have always seen as imperfect. I shot from the angles I could reach and then loaded the results. It all came out on the screen. The camera mirrors our beliefs. There was the over-bite spreading the lips too thin, the wrinkles in the brow and under the eyes, the face trying to find a smile. But, there was also the light, shining in the blue, blue eyes. There was the truth of who I am and that body of love that also shines. There was me. The unaltered me. I’ll take it as a gift. It is what I asked for in this life.
6 thoughts on “Selfies”
I liked the part that you mention about it being a “gift”…the good and the bad (the stuff we just don’t like about ourselves) How true in that we do pick ourselves apart, whether physically or even emotionally. Brings to mind the Serenity Prayer where when we apply it to our daily lives we do have more Serenity, Acceptance, Courage and Wisdom of self and of others. Thank you Alethea!! ox
Thank you, Linda. xoxox
Thank you so much for the mention, Alethea – much appreciated. You look absolutely LOVELY: such an alive and light-filled face. xxx
Thank you, Ali, for inspiring my words. I think so many of us can learn from that place of self-acceptance and love. xoxox
i saw these pictures and my first thought was “She looks so beautiful.” And then I read your description of yourself and your thoughts behind your looks. I really think this is an activity all women should do. We so frequently beat ourselves up and miss the beauty we see within ourselves.
Thank you, Kimberley. I agree, I think we all need to look for the beauty both in ourselves and in others. xo